It's been 16 years since Matthew was born. So on this important milestone day, I celebrate his birth and the memories of all that transpired that crazy summer 16 years ago.
August 1996 (A letter sent to family and friends)
Well, you may have heard by now that little Matthew has
arrived! In fact, he’s actually a little over two months old, born June 19, and
has more than doubled his birth weight of 2lbs. 4oz. and 15 inches long! The saga of Laura’s pregnancy began around Christmas
1995. So for those who already know many of the details, please bear with us as
we update those who missed the blow-by-blow.
November 1995 was a tough month for the Taylors. Our fertility
doctor informed us that after practically two years of trying to have a baby, “our
odds” of conceiving on our own were very small. We’d dreamed of children from the
beginning of our marriage and this was a big blow. So, with a desire to leave
no stone unturned we began preparation for Invitro Fertilization to begin in
January (1996). It was at that time
Laura’s prayer turned to a difficult, but confident acceptance that in spite of
all the wonderful technology available to us today, God is still the author of
life and can overcome the most dire odds to create life.
Well, Christmas came and went and we counted the days before
our IVF cycle would begin. Then on
December 28 Laura quietly, fearfully, and with a bit of sick dread for the
anticipated and familiar disappointment, took a home pregnancy test…and it came
out positive. We were in shock. And so was our fertility doctor when we shared
the news. God again demonstrated that He is a God of genesis…new life.
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| My one pregancy picture...on bedrest |
Six months of nausea, colds, migraines. Ugh! Somehow we
thought (naively) that since we’d been through so much trying to conceive that
the pregnancy itself might be smooth. No such luck! The “fun” was only
beginning. In late May (1996) Laura found herself at the doctor’s office midday
with contractions. Nothing serious, they went away and she was told to take the
next two days off. Then on June 5 at her next OB appointment the first signs of
trouble revealed itself…creeping blood pressure and protein in her urine, clear
signs of preeclampsia. She was told at 26 weeks gestation that she would not be
returning to work for the duration of the pregnancy – hopefully 14 more weeks!
By week 28 her blood pressure was 170/116 and things were
going downhill fast. Thursday, June 14, Laura was admitted to Stanford University
Hospital. It’s at times like these that we actually can thank God for our
mortgage payment in this “most expensive housing market” location…Stanford’s in
our backyard. If we were going to have this baby early, this is where we wanted
to be. To say we were scared would be an understatement. This was the baby we’d
longed for and we were only just entering the last trimester.
Within two hours of admission the doctors at Stanford were
giving Laura the first of two betamethasone shots – steroids to help the baby’s
lung development in the event of a premature delivery. The neonatal team
visited us in the middle of the night to prep us on what to expect from a
preemie of barely 2 lbs. We got more scared. It became apparent that they didn’t
expect Laura to “wait out” the pregnancy in the hospital. The race was on to
prolong the pregnancy and give Matthew his best chance for life. Ultrasounds
showed he was a very small baby even for his gestational age…another cause for
concern.
Daily ultrasounds, hourly blood pressure and hyper reflex
checks (another sign of the disease advancing) and ongoing fetal monitoring.
Then on Tuesday, June 18 the blood stopped flowing through the umbilical cord
and the decision was made to do a cesarean. When you know your baby is going to
be born in the next 24 hours, 10 ½ weeks early, weighing probably about 2 lbs.,
it shakes your expectations about becoming a parent. They kept telling us about
the amazing things they can do for preemies in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit
(NICU)…but two pounds! Laura described his anticipated size as two medium
potatoes lying end to end. People we didn’t even know were praying for us, and
we needed it.
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| The Polaroid pictures taped to my bed since I was too sick to go see him |
At 3:30 p.m., Wednesday June 19, Matthew was born. The
neonatal team took him immediately; all we saw was this extremely tiny body
being lifted out of Laura’s stomach. We heard one small cry before he was whisked
away. He looked smaller than a child’s doll. Laura was then put on a magnesium
sulfate drip for 24 hours and what Laura can only describe as physical and
emotional misery. The bright spot was Todd’s constant movement back and forth
between her room and the NICU and Todd’s glowing exclamations of how beautiful
he was…Laura contented herself with Polaroid pictures since it would be two
more days before she could see her son.
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| Momma and Matthew |
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| Daddy with the boy in the green cap |
Thus began phase three in Matthew’s joining our family—daily
trips to Stanford. As with all babies, Matthew lost weight that first week
dropping to a mere 1 lb. 15 oz. He was
so tiny and sported a huge green knit cap to help keep his body temperature
from slipping. Although tiny, the doctors’ proclaimed him to be in remarkably
good shape with amazingly healthy lungs, but the prognosis was guarded as with
all babies that small. Daily Laura held Matthew as part of Kangaroo Care:
Matthew in only a diaper and hat would nestle against Laura’s bare chest. Her
body temperature not only would keep him warm but also provide important
skin-to-skin contact that helps preemies thrive. On July 3, two weeks after his
birth Matthew was moved to the INN (Intermediate Intensive Care Nursery). This
was an important step toward going home, and testimony that he was doing
remarkably well.
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| Matthew out of the incubator...finally! |
But, the morning of July 6 had the Taylors racing back to
the emergency room at Stanford. Laura was in severe pain and could barely
speak. After ruling out gall bladder and kidney problems, the ER doctors began
to suspect pulmonary embolism. After numerous tests, it was confirmed that she
had not one but two life-threatening blood clots, one in each lung and a third
still in her pelvis. Laura was in the hospital for a week while the clots were
dissolved. It was that weekend that Matthew flirted with trouble and was
transferred back to the NICU for tests to rule out problems. Todd had his hands
full and for the first time showed the wear and tear with both his wife and son’s
lives on the line. Well thankfully Matthew needed only a blood transfusion
(common for preemie since they aren’t mature enough to manufacture their own
blood) and Laura needed time.
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| Going home day -- a wee bit over 4 lbs. |
The next six weeks are now a blurry memory of daily trips to
nurture Matthew. Like most preemies he struggled with apnea and bradycardis
episodes where his breathing would stop and his heart rate would fall. Because
he was gestationally so young, he could not immediately coordinate sucking and
swallowing and had to be gavage fed (with a feeding tube). Once learned, the
really difficult task for a preemie is coordinating sucking, swallowing and
breathing all at the same time. Slowly Matthew passed each developmental
milestone, never once succumbing to infection, brain bleeds or other
complications of prematurity. We were blessed beyond measure to have a
pediatrician who came to the hospital daily to manage Matthew’s care (and
provide Mom and Dad with encouragement). Right from the start Dr. Greene
assured us that Matthew was an amazing preemie and should have no long-term
problems.
Well Matthew came home on August 11. We’re just like every
other new family with an infant – not getting much sleep. As of August 21 he
had grown to 5 lbs., 17 ¼ inches. We are so thankful to God for his loving care
for us, who gave us the beautiful child, Matthew James, whose name means “gift
of God.”
Watching number 21 pick up that ball in November for the first time to earlier this month when he stole the ball and dribbled/drove down the court with the other team on his heels. I loved every moment and was the crazy mom screaming from the bleachers. I earned that from the moment I gave birth to this 1 lb.15 ounce wonder to that magical day. Pure grace.
